In the advent of colonialism came norms,
beliefs, religion, values and all. These things were to act as a medium where
with we measured morality and not necessarily law. How far has that gone in the
Nigeria wherewith the British colonized? How is that operating in the
Nigeria of Today?
A couple weeks ago I heard about a lady
whose lover leaked photos and videos of her which were most definitely made in
trust. Being that we are Africans and Nigerians at that how is this
matter resolved? How does it all go down in the eyes of the society we live in?
The woman tends to lose her virtue, her
job, dignity, values and her family as a whole...maybe her sanity even. I sat
back to think about this as it does happen ever so often
and becomes so scandalous when it gets out. It becomes a
cancer which eats really deep...it eats up virtually everything around and
within without as much as a scolding for the male gender. I went on to talk to
some friends about their take on the whole situation...this supposed "scandal"
which affects only the women in our society...the ones that stand out as whores
with the men invisible and considered "victors" and
"players". What are we to do? Are we allowed to love? Of course we
are! We owe it to ourselves. If we are allowed to love, it turns out or follows
immediately that we are allowed to trust. If we are allowed to love and trust
which amounts to the same thing, is this lopsided?
Many people can see themselves in a
situation such as this or many near it, where the lover's camera becomes his
eyes...where attention and want become so intoxicating...where caution is
thrown to the wind and love (trust) takes control totally! Love and trust i bet
are getting a tad too dangerous and life threatening it turns out!
Happenings such as these turn people into
monsters; make people less trusting but more vigilant, helps make others more
conceited and bitter. Our Nigerian men (as this is the case study) do not make
our women better. No one is born bitter, or conceited, or monstrous.
Situations and the society as a whole play a huge part in our existence...we do
not blame society for everything but who is society? It is the family...you and
I...that gate man, that house help, that child in school and most especially
that toddler in the play pen. Society makes us and breaks us. Our society leads
us to believe the notion that 'all men are the same"...
In reality though, ARE THEY? I’d love to
find out sometime...preferably this lifetime!
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